My Head

It's so interesting explaining the picture of the back of my head to people who don't know me...

The Sac Part 3: The Castro and My Tribute to Kirk

As mentioned before, the trip to The Sac included a day in San Francisco. We couldn't go to SF without checking out The Castro, especially with a gay man in the car with us.

I've had a lot of firsts with Kirk. How can you not when you've been friends with someone since college? I still remember when Kirk came out to me. I was the first of his people to know. I'm still honored and humbled by that distinction, which makes the fact that our friendship has lasted this long through some very difficult times even more significant to me. With at times rocky relationships with family, Kirk spent many holidays with my family while in our early twenties. My parents' house was a home open to all of our friends, especially during college holiday breaks. And Kirk was a frequent guest, though to my mom's dismay, I wasn't as gracious a hostess as she thought she had raised: the first time Kirk came over, I offered him something to drink, and after he accepted the offer, I told him where the pop, glasses and ice were. He's been getting his own drinks at Mom and Dad's ever since. And that was the beginning of Kirk becoming part of my family.

My friend has been such a big part of my life. I remember when, in college, so many in my family were suffering health issues that I often refused to answer the phone. I instead waited to hear the message on the answering machine (yes, in the times before voice mail...), as if ignoring the call and listening to the message would somehow change the reason for the call in the first place. But if Kirk was there in my room, and even when we lived together, he would enable my fear and graciously answer the phone whenever it rang. It may sound silly, but there was some comfort in knowing that he would hear it first - almost as if some of the sting of whatever horrible thing had just happened would be eased ever so slightly. And when it was the phone call that my grandpa died, and I sat in Kirk's arms, sobbing uncontrollably while feeling the most horrible emotional pain I think I have ever experienced, there's really no place that would have been better for me. He's one of my friends for whom I am most grateful.

As he began his journey of self-discovery that night in my apartment when he confessed that deep, dark secret, I had no idea that some fifteen-plus years later that it would still be a significant part of our lives together. I held his hand, hugged him and listened many times over the years as he's encountered various situations, both good and bad, and he has done the same for me. We both recognized the specialness in seeing 'Milk' together. And, during this wonderful trip to The Sac and San Francisco, we shared our first visions of The Castro together. And here are just a few.

A view of the street, with rainbow flags as far as the eye can see. I wish the picture did it justice.


Harvey's - a bar / restaurant in The Castro with much history attached regarding activism in The Castro and San Francisco, and renamed after Harvey Milk.


Gold's Gym in The Castro. Who could resist a picture of the rainbow barbell?


The corner of Castro and Market Streets - near the heart of The Castro.

This Morning...

This morning I woke up feeling perky and happy. Not artificially, but actually perky and happy. It's been so incredibly long since I've felt this way, I had almost forgotten what it was like. I had almost forgotten it was possible. I had almost lost hope of my old normalcy - of feeling a little spring in my step, a lightness in my heart, and feeling warmth in my spirit. Who knows how long the feeling will last, but I will cherish the hell out of it while I can. Happy Wednesday!